The Sunset Was My Alibi, Not The Truth

Heart

I live by the mountains. But last week I was traveling. It was one of those clear nights where the Sun was steering the evening sky.

I gazed out the Marina del Rey windows at the sunset, drifting clouds, and that big ball of Sun I love dropping into the ocean.

Ooh a rainbow moment right?

Naturally I stopped to watch the Sun sink in the Pacific, and I said: ‘There it goes—it’s gone’. Just then the last sliver disappeared.

So poetic. So seductive. And yet—false.

I stood behind the glass, the big glowing ball of conflict out of sight, my own silhouette defining itself in the reflection as the room darkened.

And I realized: it wasn’t the Sun sinking. It was me—sinking into comfortable illusions.

Me. Even me, someone who thinks about the Sun a lot, just got roasted by another illusion.

You tell me about my slippery illusions. What was reality?

• There was no “sunset.”

• The Sun was not gone.

• The Sun didn’t turn away from me. I turned away from it.

Hmm.

See, I “setted,” not the Sun. Scientifically, the Earth spun away from the light and warmth of the Sun.

But never mind science. In my story, it was the Sun who left. It’s gone now. Too bad. I even watched it leave like a helpless onlooker.

You hear it right? » ‘It’s not in my control. There’s nothing else I can do today. It’s dark now. The Sun went down, otherwise I would’ve.’

But no Friend—that was just another illusion.

Alone I spoke to the glass, “100?” Okay, I folded my arms and rocked on my heels, “Yeah, 100.”

Fine . . . fine.

Let’s be 100, let’s be scientific:

• I turned away from following my budget. Spending went wild 💸💸 
  

• I turned away from my alarm and didn’t get up early 😴
  

• I turned away from the foods that would have nourished me 🥦 
  

• I was the one who skipped the gym and drove straight to work ⏩️ 
  

• I didn’t apologize to her. Exhausted by the acidic attachment, I was tired of apologizing. She was the one who sliced my soul and can apologize to me. Looking back though . . . wasn’t it me who turned away, got up, and left the room??

What about yours? Where are you turning away and justifying it as a routine sunset?

Friend, Today » what glowing ball of conflict are you going to lean into more, instead of turning away?

Mind 🔭📚️ 

A true “sunset” never actually happens.

Reality = the Earth turns, not the Sun.

The Sun isn’t dropping, dipping, or sliding beneath anything—you are. Standing on Earth, you’re riding a planet spinning around 1,000 miles per hour.

As your location on Earth rotates away from the Sun’s light, the horizon rises between you and the Sun, creating the illusion of descent.

The colors that explode across the sky aren’t the Sun changing—they’re sunlight being stretched through more atmosphere, scattering blue wavelengths out and letting the reds and oranges dominate.

What looks like a cosmic finale is really geometry, motion, and optics playing tricks on your perspective.

Ah . . . just an illusion 🪄 

Soul ⚡️ 

🎵 I have this thing where I get older but just never wiser
Midnights become my afternoons
When my depression works the graveyard shift
All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room

I should not be left to my own devices
They come with prices and vices
I end up in crisis
(Tale as old as time)
I wake up screaming from dreaming
One day I'll watch as you're leaving
'Cause you got tired of my scheming
(For the last time)

It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me
At tea time, everybody agrees
☀️ I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror🪞 
It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero 🎶

—Song, Anti-Hero, by Taylor Swift

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